Most people have unconscious anxieties of intimacy and are self-defensive and at the same time are horrified of being alone.
Their solution to their emotional quandary is to form a fantasy bond. This misconception of connection and closeness allows them to maintain the dreams of love and loving while preserving emotional distance.
Destructive fantasy bonds can include the addiction cycle, which exist in a large majority of relationships, greatly reduce the likelihood couples achieving intimacy. This is where sex and sex addiction come in for adults living in these fantasy bonds and addiction cycles.
Once a fantasy bond is formed that includes sex addition, individuals prefer to maintain a defensive posture rather than trusting and investing genuine feeing in others. Once having been hurt, they are reluctant to take a chance again and this defensive pattern has an insidious effect on couple and family relations that is influenced by the sex addiction cycle.
Their solution to their emotional quandary is to form a fantasy bond. This misconception of connection and closeness allows them to maintain the dreams of love and loving while preserving emotional distance.
Destructive fantasy bonds can include the addiction cycle, which exist in a large majority of relationships, greatly reduce the likelihood couples achieving intimacy. This is where sex and sex addiction come in for adults living in these fantasy bonds and addiction cycles.
Once a fantasy bond is formed that includes sex addition, individuals prefer to maintain a defensive posture rather than trusting and investing genuine feeing in others. Once having been hurt, they are reluctant to take a chance again and this defensive pattern has an insidious effect on couple and family relations that is influenced by the sex addiction cycle.
The Fantasy bond is a type of relationship where the basic tie is based on routines and roles, rather than spontaneous feelings. It is a term used to describe an imaginary connection formed originally by the infant with the parent or primary caregiver, but also describes an illusory connection to another person that adults attempt to establish in their intimate associations, which leads to deterioration in the relationship.
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fantasy_bond)
People who are struggling with this issue in general at their psychological core have “arrested emotional development”.
For the Treatment method I recommend click the “Emotional Intelligence Therapy” link above.
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Notes:
The Dream relationship is a kind of relationship where the basic tie is depending on workouts and tasks, rather than natural emotions. It is a term used to explain an unreal relationship established initially by the baby with the mother or father or main care provider, but also explains an illusory relationship to another individual that grownups attempt to set up in their romantic organizations, which results in destruction in the relationship.
This kind of relationship is classified from the positive connection that happens in secure accessories. The fantasy relationship offers an impression of really like which stops actual psychological contact, and can be linked with the pseudo-independence of the self-parenting personality.
The roots of an impression relationship can be found in the problems of child years being a mother or father, refusal of which results in an over-valuation and idealisation of the parent/parents in question.
The result can be a feeling of grandiosity in accordance with the internalisation of the parent value systems, an approval of the inner writer with its automated thoughts instead for actual pertaining.
Such over-idealisation of the past defends against the re-emergence of agonizing remembrances, but also connections into the perpetuation of current ersatz relationships with only the item of idolatry modified in the new fantasy relationship. The fantasy relationship functions as a painkiller that reduces off feeling reactions and inhibits the development of a real feeling of self, and the more a individual comes to depend on dreams of relationship, the less he or she will seek or be able to agree to really like and passion in a actual relationship.
The fantasy relationship is the main protection against depression, social pain, and existential worry. Babies normally comfort themselves by using pictures and self-soothing actions to ease the stress of being divided from their care providers, so when care providers are often not available or unreliable in conference an baby's needs, the baby progressively changes to an picture of being linked with them. This fantasy relationship is a alternative for the really like and care that may be losing.
In later lifestyle the fantasy relationship may provide an illusory feeling of safety against the risk of the approach of loss of life. To different levels, all individuals makes thought connections with individuals in their lives. Many individuals have a worry of closeness and at the same time are frightened of being alone. A fantasy relationship allows them to maintain a certain psychological distance while reducing solitude, but this relationship decreases the likelihood of success in a relationship.
Therapists are cautioned to secure against the appearance of a incorrect transfer depending on an impression relationship and driven especially by arrogance.
See also:
Alice Miller
Attachment theory
Codependency
Heinz Kohut
Narcissistic parents
Narcissistic supply
Parentification
True self and incorrect self
Robert Firestone
(http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fantasy_bond)
People who are struggling with this issue in general at their psychological core have “arrested emotional development”.
For the Treatment method I recommend click the “Emotional Intelligence Therapy” link above.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Notes:
The Dream relationship is a kind of relationship where the basic tie is depending on workouts and tasks, rather than natural emotions. It is a term used to explain an unreal relationship established initially by the baby with the mother or father or main care provider, but also explains an illusory relationship to another individual that grownups attempt to set up in their romantic organizations, which results in destruction in the relationship.
This kind of relationship is classified from the positive connection that happens in secure accessories. The fantasy relationship offers an impression of really like which stops actual psychological contact, and can be linked with the pseudo-independence of the self-parenting personality.
The roots of an impression relationship can be found in the problems of child years being a mother or father, refusal of which results in an over-valuation and idealisation of the parent/parents in question.
The result can be a feeling of grandiosity in accordance with the internalisation of the parent value systems, an approval of the inner writer with its automated thoughts instead for actual pertaining.
Such over-idealisation of the past defends against the re-emergence of agonizing remembrances, but also connections into the perpetuation of current ersatz relationships with only the item of idolatry modified in the new fantasy relationship. The fantasy relationship functions as a painkiller that reduces off feeling reactions and inhibits the development of a real feeling of self, and the more a individual comes to depend on dreams of relationship, the less he or she will seek or be able to agree to really like and passion in a actual relationship.
The fantasy relationship is the main protection against depression, social pain, and existential worry. Babies normally comfort themselves by using pictures and self-soothing actions to ease the stress of being divided from their care providers, so when care providers are often not available or unreliable in conference an baby's needs, the baby progressively changes to an picture of being linked with them. This fantasy relationship is a alternative for the really like and care that may be losing.
In later lifestyle the fantasy relationship may provide an illusory feeling of safety against the risk of the approach of loss of life. To different levels, all individuals makes thought connections with individuals in their lives. Many individuals have a worry of closeness and at the same time are frightened of being alone. A fantasy relationship allows them to maintain a certain psychological distance while reducing solitude, but this relationship decreases the likelihood of success in a relationship.
Therapists are cautioned to secure against the appearance of a incorrect transfer depending on an impression relationship and driven especially by arrogance.
See also:
Alice Miller
Attachment theory
Codependency
Heinz Kohut
Narcissistic parents
Narcissistic supply
Parentification
True self and incorrect self
Robert Firestone